Girls Sports teams/Locker room disclosure?

[Anonymous]

Hi all,
Looking for advice about how to handle new sports situations. Our 9 year old trans girl (3 years since social transition) is moving up in Hockey to a competitive girls team (Seattle, Kraken development team) . This is a big time commitment – 2 practices and 1 game a week from September to March. Up until now locker rooms have not been an issue, it’s early training with little kids, parents are there to help with all the gear (and everyone wears long underwear type undergarments under their pads – there is no nudity). But now she’s older the big kids rightly handle their own gear and the kids don’t really want/need parents around in the locker rooms anymore. There is still no nudity, but she has a cup which looks different than the girls groin protection. This got noticed and commented on by girls at camp this week. She was not prepared, just said it’s a different type and tried to shift the conversation onward, but overall she felt it was awkward.

<font face=”inherit”>Today I told the coaching staff for the 1st time, It went great. To get through camp this week the coaches are just going to cut any conversation </font>like<font face=”inherit”> that off in the locker rooms. </font>But<font face=”inherit”> </font>I’m<font face=”inherit”> not sure what to do once team practices begin next month. </font><font face=”inherit”> She is going to be spending soo much of her free time and I hope making good friend and building community but it only took 3 days for girls to notice and comment her cup at camp (many of whom will be on her team).</font>

<font face=”inherit”>For context the NHL has a big “hockey is for everyone” </font>campaign<font face=”inherit”> going on, and the Kraken, as a </font>brand<font face=”inherit”> new team have diversity and inclusion as major mission points front and center. They had a lot of pride events and team gear in pride colors, painted the </font>Zamboni<font face=”inherit”> and put it in the pride parade. The Hockey association is supportive and fine with her being on the girls team (and it is still currently legally protected in WA state) but </font>I<font face=”inherit”> am, perhaps unfairly, worried about the parents if she comes out on the team. I know the hockey association will defend her right to be there and have a normal kids sports experience and I think it could be a positive thing for her and the other girls to have a supportive community in her sports team. But I just </font>don’t<font face=”inherit”> want to get in a big hullabaloo which could result from just one upset parent.</font>

<font face=”inherit”>And I </font>don’t<font face=”inherit”> even know how we would go about “coming out” on the team. It’s not like transition where we had to inform people of new name and pronouns. Just feeling out of my depth here, we’ve been pretty settled for the last 2 years and </font>I’m<font face=”inherit”> back to a lot of anxious thoughts and “what-ifs” so would </font>appreciate<font face=”inherit”> any tips/wisdom from folks with older kids who may have dealt with similar situations before.

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<font face=”inherit”>Thanks! Rachel</font>

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